don't blow

museum of jurassic technology




Tuesday, January 4, 2000
Jeff Koons

Here is a pretty scathing paragraph about Mr. Jeff Koons. I personally adore him. I like to think of him as the art world's big fat asshole. Just look at the picture of him. Doesn't the word "asshole" just pop into your head? "Ha ha, look at me, I married a porn star, I get to take sexy porno pictures with her and everyone looks at them and thinks of them as art and I get paid lots of money for them. And my other artwork? I don't even make it myself, but I still be pullin in the Benjamins." He is laughing at the entire contemporary art scene, it seems, which really needs mocking. Well actually I guess it gets mocked a lot, but have you ever met some of these gallery people? Dang. Pretentious does not even begin to describe...

Tuesday, January 4, 2000
Bust A Groove

This is the other way I spend my days. I am addicted to the Playstation. Just the other day I sat down at 7 and looked at the clock and it was midnight, and I had spent all those valuable evening hours playing this freakin game! It such a good game though. Dear Lord above, please shine heavenly light upon Japan for harboring those artists and programmers who created this magnificent game. In it you can be 10 different characters (with 4 bonus ones), all with different dancing and music styles!!! There is even a gangsta character, ohhhhhhhh!!!! I also enjoy Umjammer Lammy (previously linked) and a snow board game that I do not remember what it is called.

Tuesday, January 4, 2000

This is what I do all day. I am reduced to watching soap operas. Actually I don't think that is so bad, society has tried to make housewives and others feel guilty and dumb for watching daytime soap operas, yet the watching of "high class" shows such as Ally McBeal, ER, and Homicide (a personal favorite) is encouraged. WHAT???? These shows are soap operay too, goddammit!!! Only they don't have such stupid storylines, I guess, which is why I treasure Passions. Did you know that when the show first started there was this storyline about a character who was Princess Di's best friend, who was afraid she was going to die because everything that happened to Di happened to her??? OHHHH MAAAAN! That was my favorite ever. I also like the witch and her boy/doll, and the fact that Gwen cares sooo much about Theresa having a crush on Ethan. Why should she care? Ugghhh. Anyway I like this stuff.

Tuesday, January 4, 2000
An Old Dead Dude

TEE HEE!!!!!!! But not just any old dead dude!!!! This site is about Jeremy Bentham, the 18th-19th century British philosopher who founded the University of London. When he died, he willed all of his money to the school...with the requirement that he had to be present at every board meeting for the school forever. So he was taxidermied, and stored in a closet. Isn't that neat???? My father swears there is a webcam on Jeremy Bentham somewhere, but I have searched and searched and come up fruitless. One of the most fascinating aspects of Jeremy Bentham is that now he has a wax head.

Tuesday, January 4, 2000
Mark Ryden

Happy New Year. I suppose we're all happy that the Times Square ball did not contain a bomb that exploded when it hit the 2000, eh? That was the theory of my friend. In fact, that was the sole reason we watched the ball dropping on tv. "I wanna see em go crazy" is what she said.
This link is to Mark Ryden's online home. He is a pretty fucked up painter. I do like how meat plays an important role in many of his paintings. What kind of meat is that anyway in them? Is it a ribeye? A T-bone? Wouldn't that be fun if there was a quiz show "Name The Meat!" and if you named it correctly, you'd win 2 million dollars? And Regis would plant a big wet smackeroo on your face? At any rate, I do like what I see of this here Mark Ryden.

Friday, December 24, 1999

No, my computer has not been fixed, but due to the amazing inexpensiveness of modern technology, I am home where there is a SECOND computer with which to infect with bulgarificness!!! Yes, so that does mean more and frequent updates to this page, thank goodness. Well it is Christmastime and as a treat to you, I am linking up Purinmail, a fun and great mail service starring everyone's favorite Sanrio puppy, Purin! I am delighted to announce that I am now reachable at as well as the bulgulous address.