don't blow

museum of jurassic technology


mr. pants


art in context
We're for real muthafuckah!




I like to eat babies.
Thaddeus M. Bop


Would you be my very best friend?
Da Schnaz

My head is so big.
Lidda Bo Peep

Several times a day, I feel the need to urinate.
Puffmongah the Third

I condition daily.

Pals 4-ever!
Cecil and Pellet P.--THA TWINZ

Wednesday, March 1, 2000
Chris Burden

I was very surprised to discover that this man is very much alive. Some of his art included jumping out of corners at people on the street and electrocuting himself with two live wires right in front of them. Bizarre. But this is a page of interviews with him about his work throughout the years. When I searched on him, I also found this. Hmmm. Fancy that. A contemporary art reference on network tv. Homicide, bless you.

Sunday, February 27, 2000
Meet Craig Charles

OK, so speaking of the Red Green show, sometimes I watch Red Dwarf on PBS. Is it just me or is Lister a freakin hottie? It confuses me because the show is like 11 years old but Lister never ages or anything, or maybe I've only seen shows from the same season or something. But the other day I decided to look him up on the web, to see if he had any naked pictures anywhere. No, he didn't, but this site is his official personal site. HAHAHA What a freakin dork. I am once again reminded why I hate stand up comedy. (You see I always have this thing where I think "Man there is nothing to do out here in the middle of the prairie. If I was in a city I could go to comedy clubs or something." Then I watch the Comedy Channel for a bit and one of their stand-up specials comes on and I'm like "NOOOO". Stand up comedy is like watching a drowning man clutch desperately at a straw, pleading with God to grant him just ONE LITTLE LAUGH for heaven's sake!! It is painful.) But anyway. Craig Charles. These make me want to barf with disappointment and these are also pretty dumb. Also all the pictures across the whole site where he is mugging for the camera are a bit much.
OOPS! I just realized that with all these fancy web counters around nowadays, he is sure to check his referrals and find these comments. I AM SORRY CRAIG CHARLES.

Sunday, February 27, 2000

This is another holiday greeting from my father. What is it with dads? They dress up their cats and then start watching The Red Green Show. (Speaking of, I love this character, because he reminds me of the toothless British blokes in Billy Bragg's band...The Blokes.) Oh well, "Laissez les bon temps roulez!"
On a side note, some dude on the radio just described how he is drinking a bottle of Snapple that fell in the toilet. Ewwwww.

Sunday, February 27, 2000
Cyberpunk Band

Here is some more bulgy action comin at ya. This is the first thing to make me laugh ALL weekend. (Now how sad is that?) But anyway. this is probably the best one, but the others are really great too. It is 386 DX, touted as "the world's first cyberpunk band." I found this site via a link from don't blow, one of my favorite web sites ever.

Thursday, February 24, 2000

The above link is just the best ever!!! I know I say that about everything but Mr. Lunch is all I live for anymore!! And this is just so good! I found it from google, the official search engine of bulgy pitas. The other wonderful wonderful things found: another funfunfun animation, Chongo Chingo from Penguin Dreams in an animation, and a Mr. Lunch trading card (from this article here. (The whole site for the animations is here.)
I just discovered that the ampersand pita linked this animation in september. I think I will just curl up and diiiiiie. I am always so behind.

Wednesday, February 23, 2000

I thought I would add my newly set up wish list to my pitas. It is actually more for the benefit of friends who continually ask "What are you interested in now? What the hell can I buy you for (blank) holiday, bizatch?" But also if a philanthropist is reading this well I do enjoy presents.....

Wednesday, February 23, 2000
Sim People

I was a SimCity addict. Actually, I liked all of the Maxis SIm Games. (even Sim Tower!) But I really really want this game a lot.

Wednesday, February 23, 2000

Speaking of embarassing stories with parents, here is a good one dealing with this site. This link takes you to an...interesting picture. It was found for me by a friend of one of my old high school friends when I visited her at college, as a welcoming present. Well, I liked it so much that when I went home, I printed out a bunch of copies from the family computer. THe first few didn't print all the way, so I threw most of them out, but, by mistake, left one on the counter by the computer... Well the next day I'm watching tv with my dad and all of the sudden he says, "Was that your printout by the computer?" And I reply, "Uhhhh" while inside I'm shrieking "NOOO!!! DO NOT DISCUSS THIS WITH ME!!!" And he says, "When I saw that, my testicles nearly drew up into my chest!"
Another story with this picture: It was pasted up on the door to my room freshman year. My roommate's family visited often, and when her 9 year old sister came once, Melissa pointed to the picture and asked her, "Do you know what this is?" And her little sister replied, "YEAH!!! I saw one of those on Jenny Jones!"

Wednesday, February 23, 2000

It is another semester, and as such, I have another radio show!! This time Erika and I team up with Brian, her brit pop and techno loving boyfriend, for The Hair Show. THe premise of The Hair Show is this:
Two hair puppets (puppets made out of hair) named Mullet and Merkin were very popular in the early to mid 70's, with a very famous and hilarious variety tv show entitled "Mullet and Merkin's Variety Show". They were at the top of the totem pole for a few years, until plummetting ratings and the public's waning fascination with hair puppets caused them to fall into a dark pit of booze, drugs, and sexual promiscuity. Though they struggled through rehab in the 80s and 90s, they are only now plotting their comeback. However, they are confined only to radio because their dark years of sin left them horribly horribly disfigured, too grotesque for the public to behold!! Now they join their old manager, Mutton Chops, for their first show in 22 years, "The Hair Show", on Grinnell College's very own KDIC 88.5 FM.
Now, we think the main reason why we got this show is because the station staff had no idea what a merkin was. Well this link will tell you all about them!! I actually learned more than I already knew from it! Now for a story dealing with merkins: Erika's old screenname on AOL was MsMerkin. When her father saw it, he cried "ERIKA!!! Do you know what that is???" And she was highly embarassed.

Saturday, February 19, 2000
American PSYCHO

WHen I heard they were making this horrible horrible book into a movie, I nearly barfed. I don't really understand how they can do it. The magic of Hollywood, I guess, can turn a book about a horrible horrible sex/murder maniac into a riotous adventure fit for an over 18 audience. Really, I mean I read stuff in that book that put me off of sex for a year. I will not even begin to voice my opinions on Bret Easton Ellis and his other works. No.
Oh who am I kidding. I bet I'll be there on opening night. Poo.

Saturday, February 19, 2000
James Joyce 4eva

Sometimes I think I am a humungous nerd for getting so excited about my classes at college. But I just cannot help it!! This semester I am taking a seminar on James Joyce, in which we are reading Ulysses for 14 weeks (which, despite the fact that the book is only about 700 pages, is not NEARLY enough time to understand it). It is a masochistic endeavor, like many of my interests. (Haha, I bet you were scared of that link huh?) At any rate, I found this site accidentally while poking around at Robot Wisdom. What a delight!

Saturday, February 19, 2000

Hmmm. Well here is another exciting entry. It is a recipe for stained glass window cookies. They sound super beautiful. I have always liked decorating cookies, which I do almost every Christmas with my older sister Emily. But let me tell you, it is a bad idea to let two 20+ year olds at your frosted people-shaped Christmas cookies. All the broken ones turned into bloody amputees last year and we even made a Freddy Krueger cookie (with toothpick hand spikes). Speaking of Freddy Krueger, I was poking around the Unofficial Emily Bergl fan site (she starred in Carrie 2: The Rage), and found this. Hahahhaah. I hope that link works.

Monday, February 14, 2000

This band sounds a lot like my sister. It is eery.
Hey here's also a little reminder to check my diary, too. I changed it finally!!

Monday, February 14, 2000

Well I guess I haven't mentioned this before. When I am back in NJ, where I grew up, I live in the same town that Kevin Smith works out of--Red Bank. (You may see beautiful shots of it in Chasing Amy.) The bonus to this is I get to see Jason Mewes freakin everywhere. Perhaps the best time ever was a boring Friday night last summer when I was driving around town with my friend Lisa. We drove past this bar called Brannigans and noticed the drunken antics of a few men outside. Lisa yells at them "WASTED!" as if to inform of their own state and then realizes she recognizes one of them. "IT's JAY, AND HE'S WASTED!" she shouts. Jay lifts his beer to her as if to say "hell yeah".
OK so it was pretty funny at the time.

Monday, February 14, 2000

This next pitas shout out is to mister pants, who linked this wonderful diary on his site and thus I found it. It is tremendously adorable, like babies and kitties and all those fluffy things that everyone loves. Oh, that sentence makes this sound sarcastic. Even after 7 or so years I still haven't gotten this whole sarcastic over the computer thing down. Meaning, I don't catch it in other people's stuff or people read it in my stuff when it really isn't there. Boo. But I really mean I like this site. Please read.

Monday, February 14, 2000
Cupid appears as if I have been shamed into updating regularly by the demanding Pitas Superstar, Gilbert. Well, demanding if it means suggesting that, perhaps, updating more than once monthly might be beneficial for the health of this site...
That is most definitely true. Sadly, I have been very disinterested in the WWW lately. Has this same disinterest been affecting you? I can't figure out if nothing is exciting anymore, or if it is just winter. I have lately been amusing myself writing epic poetry about unrequited love and broken dreams and weeping. Oh mother, I can feel the soil falling over my head...
At any rate, I decided a nice clean slate was in order, as well as a Valentine to all of my sweethearts out there! THis one was sent to me by my dad (parents are the best Valentines, they give the best presents), and brings to mind all those scary people who enjoy dressing their cats up at every opportunity. The bonus with this picture, is you can see the inside of my house! Well sort of.

I'm a baby.
C. Cabbage Crunchah

Hats off to bulgy pitas, old chap!
Tha Fop

Please don't think this is something nasty.
Big Mama & Lumpy

This is the best birthday ever.
Tha Squad--Spunky, Joe, and Angel

This is the secret message.
Pillow-Talking Marti O. and Miss Fluffypuff

Reprazentin' Newton, IA!

These are not the same piggies!
Tha Bus and Broc-O-Lee

Hay, give me some hay.